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Are You Making These 5 Mistakes When Trying to Let Go After a Breakup?

Breakups hurt. And when you're in that raw, vulnerable space, it's tempting to search for anything that promises quick relief—even breakup spells that claim to magically erase the pain. But here's ...

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Sarah Thompson

January 7, 2026 · 4 min read

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Are You Making These 5 Mistakes When Trying to Let Go After a Breakup?

Are You Making These 5 Mistakes When Trying to Let Go After a Breakup?

Breakups hurt. And when you're in that raw, vulnerable space, it's tempting to search for anything that promises quick relief—even breakup spells that claim to magically erase the pain. But here's the truth: while you're desperately seeking shortcuts, you might be making mistakes that actually prolong your healing. Let's explore five common missteps that keep you stuck, and what to do instead.

The journey through a relationship ending isn't about finding magical solutions or avoiding discomfort. It's about understanding how your brain processes loss and giving yourself the tools to move through it effectively. Research shows that people who engage with their emotions directly recover faster than those who seek external fixes. Ready to see if you're making these mistakes?

Mistake #1: Searching for Breakup Spells Instead of Building Emotional Skills

When you Google "best breakup spells" at 2 AM, you're looking for someone or something to take away your pain. This makes total sense—who wouldn't want an instant solution? But this search reveals a deeper issue: the belief that healing happens to you, not through you.

The alternative? Develop practical emotional regulation techniques. Your brain has an incredible capacity to process difficult emotions when you give it the right tools. Instead of seeking breakup spells tips from external sources, focus on emotional intelligence strategies that build your internal resources. Think of it as upgrading your emotional operating system rather than installing a temporary patch.

Mistake #2: Avoiding the Emotional Work Required for Real Healing

Here's where many breakup spells strategies fall apart: they promise results without effort. But your emotions don't work like that. When you avoid feeling your feelings, they don't disappear—they just wait in the wings, ready to resurface at inconvenient moments.

The research is clear: emotional avoidance prolongs distress. Your brain needs to process what happened, and that means actually experiencing your emotions rather than numbing them. This doesn't mean drowning in sadness for months. It means giving yourself permission to feel angry, sad, relieved, or confused for short periods throughout your day.

Try this: Set aside 10 minutes daily to acknowledge whatever emotions show up. Notice where you feel them in your body. This simple practice helps your brain categorize and process the experience more effectively than any how to breakup spells guide could offer.

Mistake #3: Refusing to Accept Reality Through Effective Breakup Spells Thinking

When you search for effective breakup spells, you're often looking for ways to change what happened or control the outcome. This keeps you stuck in a mental loop of "what if" and "if only." Your brain struggles to move forward when you haven't fully accepted that the relationship ended.

Acceptance doesn't mean you're happy about the breakup. It means you stop fighting against reality. This shift is powerful because it redirects your mental energy from trying to change the past to building self-trust for your future.

The breakup spells techniques that actually work involve recognizing reality clearly. Ask yourself: "What am I still resisting about this situation?" Then practice the phrase: "This is what happened, and I'm capable of handling it."

Mistake #4: Staying Connected Through Social Media Stalking

No breakup spells guide will help if you're checking your ex's Instagram stories five times daily. This digital connection keeps your brain in a state of partial attachment, making it nearly impossible to move forward. Every post you see reactivates the neural pathways associated with your relationship.

The solution is straightforward but not easy: create distance. Unfollow, mute, or block your ex on social platforms. This isn't about being petty—it's about giving your brain the space it needs to rewire. Research shows that people who maintain digital boundaries after breakups experience reduced anxiety and faster emotional recovery.

Mistake #5: Rushing Into New Relationships as Breakup Spells Strategies

Using new relationships as breakup spells strategies might provide temporary relief, but it prevents genuine healing. When you jump into something new before processing the old, you carry unresolved patterns into your next connection.

Instead, use this time to understand what you learned. What patterns do you want to change? What needs weren't being met? This reflection builds the foundation for healthier future relationships. Give yourself permission to be single and focus on personal growth rather than seeking another person to complete you.

The most effective breakup spells aren't spells at all—they're evidence-based emotional tools that help you process, grow, and move forward. Ready to trade magical thinking for real transformation?

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Emotions often get the best of us: They make us worry, argue, procrastinate…


But we’re not at their mercy: We can learn to notice our triggers, see things in a new light, and use feelings to our advantage.


Join Ahead and actually rewire your brain. No more “in one ear, out the other.” Your future self says thanks!

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