Anxiety

Encouragement

For whom do you want to become a calmer person?

Many people strive to become calmer, recognizing that managing emotions like anger or impatience is crucial for personal well-being and healthy relationships. Reactivity, stress, and outbursts can negatively impact not only ourselves but also those we care about most, leading to feelings of guilt, regret, and disconnection. Understanding the deep-seated reasons behind this desire for calm can be a powerful motivator for change.

We asked our community the deeply personal question, "For whom do you want to become a calmer person?" because exploring the 'why' behind self-improvement goals often reveals core values and strengthens commitment. The responses poured in, painting a vivid picture of shared human experiences centered around self-love, protecting loved ones, and breaking harmful patterns.

Overwhelmingly, community members expressed a desire to change for themselves, recognizing that inner peace is foundational. Many also highlighted the profound impact their emotional state has on their children, partners, and families, expressing a strong drive to nurture those relationships and avoid passing down negative cycles. Others mentioned colleagues and friends, showing a broad awareness of how calmness affects all interactions.

Common Motivations for Becoming Calmer Shared by Our Community

For Oneself: Seeking inner peace, improved mental health, self-love, and escaping feelings like guilt or being out of control.
For Children: Aiming to be a better role model, provide a stable environment, break generational cycles of anger, and nurture their emotional well-being.
For Partners: Wanting to improve communication, reduce conflict, show appreciation, and build a stronger, more supportive relationship.
For Family & Friends: Desiring healthier interactions, less friction, and avoiding causing hurt to parents, siblings, and friends.
Breaking Negative Cycles: Actively working to overcome patterns of anger or reactivity learned from past experiences or family upbringing.

Our community discussed

Why Becoming Calmer Often Starts with You

Many individuals recognize that the journey towards calmness is deeply personal. The desire stems from wanting inner peace, better mental health, and freedom from the negative feelings that anger or reactivity can bring, like guilt, regret, or feeling out of control.

Bree

5 months ago

For myself. I don’t want to keep hurting the people I love.

283

Sebastian

5 months ago

For myself. I want to be calmer for my daughters and all of my loved ones, but it starts with myself first. You cannot pour from an empty cup.

341

Nathalie

5 months ago

For myself.. so I can feel happier and more relaxed. I don’t want to always be on edge and so sensitive.

215

Roni

5 months ago

For myself. So I can stop being embarrassed after I lose control. I want to be able to communicate and be respected.

198

Our community discussed

How Wanting to Become Calmer Impacts Parenting and Family Life

A significant motivation for seeking calmness is the well-being of children and family. Parents expressed a strong desire to break generational cycles of anger, provide a stable emotional environment, and be patient, loving role models for their kids.

Taylor

8 months ago

For my 10 year old daughter, who I’ve hurt a lot

310

Chelsea

5 months ago

For myself, my child and my husband. I always told myself I would not be this person around my kids the way my parents were and now here I am, being them. No more.

325

Ashley

8 months ago

My daughter I want to break the cycle of anger

295

Cristy

8 months ago

Myself and my children. I want to be a role model for them. Managing my anger is something I struggle with and now my girls are mimicking my bad habits (yelling/slamming doors/gritting teeth). I want to show them how to manage those big feeling in a better way.

330

Our community discussed

The Role of Becoming Calmer in Nurturing Relationships

Improving relationships with partners, family, friends, and even colleagues is another key reason people want to cultivate calm. They aim to communicate more effectively, reduce conflict, and avoid hurting those they are close to with emotional outbursts or impatience.

Leenke

8 months ago

My partner and my step children

188

Haley

7 months ago

My amazing, supportive and patient husband

261

Kali

5 months ago

For myself, my family, friends, and partner

205

Patrick

6 months ago

I want to become a calmer person for my wife and kids before I lose the ones I love

312

Advice from our community

How to Cultivate Calmness: Insights from Shared Motivations

Prioritize Yourself: Many recognize that becoming calmer starts from within. As Sebastian put it, "You cannot pour from an empty cup." Focusing on your own peace and well-being is essential before you can be calmer for others.
Acknowledge Your Impact: Understand how your emotional state affects loved ones, especially children. Comments about kids mimicking behaviors or feeling hurt highlight the importance of being a positive role model.
Commit to Breaking Cycles: Numerous comments mention wanting to avoid repeating negative patterns learned from parents or past experiences. Recognizing these cycles is the first step toward changing them.
Focus on Repairing and Improving Relationships: Whether it's with a partner, family, or friends, the desire to communicate better, avoid causing pain, and strengthen connections is a powerful driver for managing emotions more effectively.